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Excuses For Not Going To A 3 Y/o B-day Party?

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Sorry it’s so long, but please read?
So, my family is invited to our family friends’ kid’s birthday. Thing is, I REALLY don’t like these people, but I try to act like I do. They said that they really want me to come cuz they haven’t seen me for over half a year, bla bla bla.
K, so I don’t want to go, mainly because I don’t like them, but also because the atmosphere at their place is just so utterly boring. There is nobody around my age. Their kids are 1, 3 and 11. I’m 17. And these children are SO ANNOYING. The rest of the guests will be adults with their little children. I don’t want to be a babysitter all day, and I don’t want to hang around the adults cuz I know that with these people, I’m never included. They talk about mature topics like pregnancy, breastfeeding and parenting in general, which, obviously, don’t apply to me. So I’ll be sitting there doing nothing and being annoyed by these children, and the mothers telling me to check up on their kids. I know this for a fact, as it HAS happened before – NOT FUN.
Another thing, I have a LOT of schoolwork due sometime next week, but this excuse had become so overused with these guys that they probably think that I’m some really nerdy kid that needs to get out more. NOT TRUE. I was going to plan a day out with friends but most of them are in the same classes as me so, of course, school is the ultimate priority this weekend.
The only reason I’d consider going there is free food, but even I don’t think it’s worth the ~8 hour stay there (I’m a sucker for free food).
I can’t really lie that I’m going somewhere cuz they may pop by my house and try to convince me to come (happened as well, just not to me). I can’t fake sick either, cuz someone’s probably gonna check up on me cuz they live really close to us (these people [guests as well] are really messed up and think that I can’t fend for myself, even if perfectly healthy. I’M 17 FOR GOODNESS’ SAKE!).
So, I’d rather not offend these people, but I really don’t care too much as long as don’t have to go there.
So, what are some good excuses?

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